A Reflection of Me

If you have ever visited this site, you will notice the design is radically different. Startlingly so, I suspect. Yet it is more me than the last iteration (FarFringe 2.0), despite all of my wanting the light loops and soft flowery colors to be me. As a reminder, here’s what the old header looked like: …

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Confessions of a Usually Sexual Being

For much of my adult life, I’ve been a consciously sexual being. I recognize in myself an enjoyment of the human body – mine and others – and have had a number of satisfying (and a few unsatisfying) sexual relationships. I love that part of our being human that makes us both sexual and aware of our sexuality. …

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Remembering

My memory is a little messed up. In 2007-early 2008, I had severe back problems and was on pretty heavy pain meds for about 18 months. Within that year, I had three surgical procedures, each one requiring general anesthesia. As I came out of that time period feeling much better and reemerging into the world, …

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I didn’t know what to say then.

This is a post I should have written a month ago, when Rev. Jennifer Slade took her life – a beautiful, brilliant, humanity-affirming life. Her death was shocking and jarring. But I didn’t write then, perhaps because while she was a colleague, I didn’t know her personally and didn’t know how to parse it. I didn’t know …

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Sundry and Various

No real reason for this post, except that I haven’t written in a while and I don’t like to leave my imaginary readers hanging. Just some random thoughts… Speaking in Albany I made the mistake of suggesting a topic I wasn’t very interested in when Sam Trumbore and I talked about my speaking in Albany …

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So much on my mind

Forgive the distracted nature of this diary… for I am feeling distracted. Distracted by descisions… Distracted by feelings… Distracted by overanalysis… I seem to be thinking rather than experiencing. And it’s affected my relationships, my work, my spiritual practice, and my choices. I need to simply Be In my relationship, Do my work, Be Open …

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The more I look

I got the confirmation of my visit to Union Theological Seminary today, and after Carl noted that I’d be attending a class with James Cone, I looked him up – he’s quite well known in theological circles for his work on liberation theology. Carl was jealous, and it made me happy to know I was …

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A Day Spent Searching

Last Monday evening, I had one of those odd days that ended in tearful,  lamentful, “I am a worm” prayers… long wails about how horrible I am, how no one could love me, how unworthy I am. but as the tears subsided, I was led to find the old Methodist hymnal I have kicking around …

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Another Year Passed

So…today is my 46th birthday. About 9 years ago, a friend suggested that your birthday was the perfect time to assess… to name something that was truly a success, something that you learned, and some new vision or hope you developed. Success While you’d think keeping my business open and growing would be the item …

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A Sea Change

So what I realize is that all of my prayers, laments, reading, understanding, and exploring has been incredibly selfish and self-centered. It’s all been about what I want, how I see my world, how God can help me. There has been pride – I know more, I think more, I am holier more. And I have …

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Loving God

A theme in my prayers and laments of late has been about how/why/whether God loves me. I’ve spent years certain I was his favorite punching bag, of little consequence. How could it be that after all I’ve gone through, I should know that I am loved? Why would a deity who supposedly love me treat …

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Oasis

“UU Wellsprings: Inspiration and Guidance for a Spiritual Journey” Really? Another freaking JOURNEY? I’m sick of being on a journey. I have wandered through the wilderness. I have seen the inhabitable terrain and exhausted myself climbing insurmountable mountains. I’m tired…so tired. So why would I go on ANOTHER journey? Which is why, I suppose, I …

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Wellsprings – A Beacon of Hope?

Today, I attended the first retreat for the Wellsprings UU Spiritual Deepening program – a ten-month program of spiritual practice, spiritual direction, and spiritual deepening. Along with 19 other UUs in the Capital Region, we will explore together deeper questions of faith, belief, and a call to action. For me, it feels like a beacon …

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